30 Days to Yelling Less: Day 13

Steps to a better morning

 

As moms, we are so busy caring for everyone else we sometimes forget about ourselves. We forget simple things like eating or drinking or stopping for a rest. We are so wrapped up in getting the kids dressed, getting breakfast, changing diapers, helping with potty time, doing a bit of laundry while  also filing the kid’s juice cups again, and doing dishes while also breaking up fights or putting a new movie on to watch. For me, sometimes it’s not until I’m feeling dizzy and light headed that I look at the clock and realize I’ve been up for three hours and haven’t eaten breakfast or had anything to drink yet. 

 

While tracking triggers I noticed that dehydration and hunger were major contributions to my temper and reasons for yelling. I also noticed that feeling down or unproductive or just generally bad about myself can keep me on edge also.

 

Now that we tracked our triggers we are supposed to try to work on them and pick some that are fixable to address. Today I decided to work on those three. I decided to do a few things first-thing in the morning to take care of me for a change and see if it helped my mood.

 

1. When the children woke up I immediately brought them down stairs. I got them on the couch, snuggled up in blankets and content with some juice. I then went to the kitchen and before I started getting their breakfast I drank some water. The next few hours would fly by so starting with a large glass of water would help me stay hydrated because I probably would forget to keep “sipping” through-out the day.

 

A long time ago I read on a blog somewhere (can’t remember who’s blog it was now) that this mom liked to start the day looking good. Even though she stays home all day and no one sees her but her kids she finds that if she looks good, she feels good. And if she feels good she feels more motivated and more at ease with her day. It’s good for us as women to feel good about ourselves. For her that meant even if she couldn’t find the time to take a shower she would wash her face, pull back her hair, and apply a little make up. She picked a quick routine that she could do in a few minutes.

 

2. I decided to apply this to my morning strategy. Maybe putting a little effort into my looks and getting out of my PJs, which I have a tendency to wear till the afternoon, will help me feel better about myself and about my day. Now I don’t wear make up so I just washed my face, put my hair up in a pony tail/bun thing, and got dressed. Now I of course did this with two little boys right by my side because they can’t possibly see why mommy would need 5 minutes to herself. Although, I did lock them out of my room to get dressed. Just doing these three little things took way longer than they needed to with all the stopping I had to do to shush them or tell them to stop hitting or to pry my little one off my leg so I could move across the room. But, I got it done and I really did feel better. I felt clean even though I just washed my face. I felt happy with the way I looked for the moment. I was not that presentable to go out to a fancy dinner but just for staying home and doing laundry I looked pretty nice.  

 

3. I never sit and eat breakfast with my boys. Usually I have other things that need done and when the boys are both occupied for a few minutes I need to take advantage of that. If I do decide to eat with them they are done eating before my breakfast is ready or right when I sit down. So then I have to stop eating to either get them more, or wash their hands and faces, and clean up the yogurt smears or sweep up the crumbs. It is sometimes more frustrating to me, so I just don’t do it. But I need to eat. So today I made sure that I took the time. I made myself and egg and sat at the table and ate. I had to deal with loud singing and my little one trying to crawl in my lap. It was annoying and I used this golden opportunity to practice my ‘no yelling’. I handled it well.

 

So I was hydrated, clean, dressed, and fed. Usually this is what you focus on for your kids. It is so easy to forget that you need to do these things too. Today has gone pretty well. I am more relaxed and I have more energy. Now I just have to remember to apply this to my daily routine even if it takes me all morning to accomplish.

 

* If you are struggling with yelling and are wanting to stop please check out The Orange Rhino for tips, ideas, and inspiration.*

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